Used to work security, and one time during our CPR/AED training, this dude, we’ll call him Officer Dumbfuck, kept asking dumbass questions. We’re talking, like, “if a person is pregnant and too large to get my hands around for a heimlich, can I just punch them?” And “if there’s no AED available, should we just shock them with like some wires plugged into a socket?”
Which, I mean, good thing he asked instead of doing that shit… But yeah. Officer Dumbfuck was a dumb fuck. Our entire training was supposed to be around 2 hours. We were there for 6. The instructor barely would get two or three sentences in before Officer Dumbfuck came in with another dumb as fuck question.
Finally, by the end, the instructor is visible upset, everyone there is stressed as fuck and we all just want to leave.
Instructor: okay. Well. I think we have covered every possible thing. So if we’re done here, I’m going to get home.
Me: excitedly actually I have a question!
Entire class: exhales enough to change the humidity in the room
Instructor: defeated, exhausted … Yes?
Me: nah I’m just screwing with y’all. See ya next year!
Used to work security, and one time during our CPR/AED training, this dude, we’ll call him Officer Dumbfuck, kept asking dumbass questions. We’re talking, like, “if a person is pregnant and too large to get my hands around for a heimlich, can I just punch them?” And “if there’s no AED available, should we just shock them with like some wires plugged into a socket?”
Which, I mean, good thing he asked instead of doing that shit… But yeah. Officer Dumbfuck was a dumb fuck. Our entire training was supposed to be around 2 hours. We were there for 6. The instructor barely would get two or three sentences in before Officer Dumbfuck came in with another dumb as fuck question.
Finally, by the end, the instructor is visible upset, everyone there is stressed as fuck and we all just want to leave.
Instructor: okay. Well. I think we have covered every possible thing. So if we’re done here, I’m going to get home.
Me: excitedly actually I have a question!
Entire class: exhales enough to change the humidity in the room
Instructor: defeated, exhausted … Yes?
Me: nah I’m just screwing with y’all. See ya next year!