Ooh and the question specifically mentions “someone else.” By the time I scrolled down enough, I forgot about that.
Anyway I have both considered offing myself, and on a night where a dude scared me on a dark street I wished I had a gun. I guess that’s not the same as wanting to shoot him. I just wanted to have something that would make him as scared of me as I was of him. I just wanted to be left alone.
Ooh that’s a good point! I hadn’t looked at it like that!
Of course the meltdown I’m thinking of is that his own toddler was trying to eat old food off the floor and I was preventing that and offering fresh food while babysitting for free for him.
He doesn’t have meltdowns so often now, but the only thing that changed is that he feels safe and comfortable around us. Ironically, his bad behavior is what made us uncomfortable around him which is what made him feel unsafe. So as it got better, it just got better and better.
Unfortunately for him, he was raised in an emotionally abusive home, so his regular bad behavior was learned and then when we reacted poorly to that it would lead to an actual meltdown. Consistent kind behavior and firm boundaries is what eventually led to a two way street respectful situation. A meltdown now would be much more accepted and understood but we had to go to group therapy to get here.
Embarrassingly, I think I’m someone who struggles with both ideas. How many meltdowns am I expected to accommodate before someone is not invited back to a social event? A work event? Because if a neurotypical yelled obscenities at me, it would be one and done, but I’m expected to forgive and forget when the person is autistic. How many times do you accommodate someone’s tardiness? I have ADHD, and I work really hard to be on time, but I’m late plenty. Sometimes for work. Often for social events. It’s not because i don’t care about other people’s time. I try really hard, I just fail a lot. Like who decides what’s reasonable?
The reason is to get a notification it’s coming. The reason is because I’m so fried surviving, I don’t have the mental energy to spend on calculating the due date and then changing it by a day due to trends I’d also have to track. I barely remember to log it in an app, there’s no way I’m logging it on a calendar, and then keeping track of that paper for multiple months or years to track trends. bleeding through my pants at work is worse to me than the spyware. Being a woman is hard enough. Blame the Spyware, not the women.
In the early 2000s in the US these numbers were taken, but there was like 10 feet between the front of the line and the scale so hypothetically private. Didn’t stop your friends from asking what your numbers were the second you stepped off, so kind of a weird self imposed humiliation.
Wouldn’t that mean no one can visit your home, though? Or if they did, that they’d have to leave their cells/ tablets outside?
In my town the cheapest drinks are at the casino. They want you drunk, and they want your money in the slots
That’s all very lovely but I think you’re missing the point of what I’m trying to say.
I’m not saying anyone is dropping loads of money to impress anyone, I’m saying going out in most any context costs loads of money without even being “impressive”.
Obviously a hike and a picnic is a great date! But it’s reckless and irresponsible as a first date. You could end up murdered. For a first date you’re likely meeting in a public place. Heck, even in your own example your first date was in a bar, which now a days is a dozens of dollars experience for just a few drinks, much more if you’re buying for two or it’s a nice bar, or if there’s any food involved.
I’m saying even for frugal people (hell, my husband and I first got to talking in a thrift store through a mutual friend!) dating is expensive, and it’s not about preferences, it’s just that eating out at all or even just drinks or coffee not at home is very pricey.
Well hard to undermine trust in a system everyone Already knows is rigged. Though I know this isn’t what was meant :(
If you qualify but feel too guilty, take it and just don’t use it. That way, in an emergency you have it, but you’re not taking anything “away from anybody.”
But also, take it and use it! This country should be providing health care to everyone. Private insurance is a freakin scam
Except he was always vaguely hinting that by end the war he meant give Isreal everything they wanted therefore “ending” the war. Same with Russia and Ukraine.
Idk i always hated being bored. I just always always had a book with me. If I was near the end of a book, I had to carry two so there would be no gaps. I don’t think my books were superior to carrying a screen. I still have a book in my purse anytime I go anywhere. I absolutely loathe sitting still doing nothing. Maybe it’s the depression. Idk.
Well… simpler for you. Unless the store is low on ones, I never understood why this feels like a favor. It’s nicer for you to walk away with just a five rather than two ones back when you already have an extra 2 ones in your wallet you don’t want. A cashier doesn’t care what denominations they have.
Either way, embarrassing when people can’t do basic addition (though I remember the first time this happened to me as a teenager, and it wasn’t the addition that tripped me up, it was the concept. The customer was so impatient because it was so “obvious” they wanted fewer bills back, but I was just afraid I was missing something they were trying to buy. I’m guessing as cash becomes rarer, more people just are unfamiliar with this tactic.)
I just don’t have it in me to regularly participate in a book club. Short form practice when I can fit it in sounds so nice. I love reading and I read a book or two (sometimes 5) a month, but they’re always low effort fiction so I’m not really practicing any skills. My reading is far too interrupted (by life, toddler, chores, pregnancy) for me to read anything that requires critical thought. It’s hard enough to follow a plot when I’m getting only 2 pages (or less) at a time, sprinkled through out the day. I hope in a few years when my kid’s can finally read to themselves I can manage to get back to actually thoughtful reading.
Plus $40 for parking! That’s not included!
Costco really only makes sense with a family or group. Buying in bulk isn’t necessarily better for a single person, especially given that any impulse buys are more expensive at Costco
I mean no offense, but some Dr’s are wild. It’s not just babies who are faking pain, but also women and POC. My husband was given the same pain meds/schedule for a cut on his thumb that I was for childbirth with a second degree tear. He was given even better pain meds the time we went in for a “mystery pain” in his chest that they could find no evidence of.
I can’t imagine how this is true. Must be no drink, no apps, no dessert, and mindful choices on entrees. Because just an entree at a regular ( not fancy) place in my town is 24-32 bucks and that’s not for the nicest dish. A drink is 8 to 25 bucks depending on whether it’s a cocktail. Yeah, your spouse is fine with a quick meal with no add ons, but for a date, where the point is to kill time together, relax and get to know each other, lingering over a dessert and having a drink or two to loosen up is kind of the point.
Obviously you can agree that your first date should be going out to get coffee to see if you click, but that’s still going to be 50 bucks after two to four drinks and a couple of scones.
Thinking that 50 percent of women are shallow gold diggers seems a bit high. There are plenty of men who have superficial feelings about how they want their wife to look, but it’s nowhere near 50/50. Usually those gym bros and trophy wives pair up so they’re not really hurting anyone normal with their expectations.
Personally, I wear a silicone ring. So does my spouse. Our rings for our wedding were a hand me down and a band with a non diamond stone. That said, it’s fair to want a ring. It’s fair to want the tradition, and it’s fair to be comforted by the idea that your partner has been thinking about asking you to merge lives for longer than just today. A ring used to mean more when women weren’t allowed their own bank accounts (actually very recently, in the scheme of things), but it’s still meaningful in a society where we’re taught (incorrectly) that men value non commitment, and don’t want to get “chained” to a “nagging wife.”
Funnily, it’s guys who make comments like you (that it’s a total toss up whether any woman has an ounce of substance to her or if she’s a total bimbo who only cares about money) that make women afraid that men are not going to fully commit which is why things like a big unnecessary time commitment before the proposal seems romantic and reassuring