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Cake day: June 12th, 2023

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  • I worked with a guy once, we’ll call him “Kevin”

    I was making coffee in the office one day. Picture a typical Mr. Coffee type drip coffee maker. I filled the filter with grounds. I filled the glass pot with water. I poured the water into the reservoir. I missed a little - maybe ½ oz (~15ml) - that was left in the bottom of the carafe. Whatever, though, right? Coffee is mostly water, anyway. Whether that little bit went through the grounds or not doesn’t make a noticeable difference. I put it down in the machine and hit “start”.

    Kevin was there and saw what happened.
    “There’s some water still” he says, pointing at the carafe.
    “Eh, yeah, but…” I started to say, before my brain interrupted me and I went wide-eyed.

    Kevin decided that he would remedy this himself. He turned his pointing into a reaching, then a grabbing, then lifting the coffee pot. He thought he would pour the remaining water into the reservoir.

    Before I could tell him to put it back, the coffee started coming out. With no pot in place to catch it, it starts going directly on the hot plate. Of course, Kevin is turning to me to argue about whether the water should be put in the reservoir or not. He’s not paying attention to what he’s doing.

    A moment later, when he finally notices, he starts freaking out. Notably, this freaking out did not include immediately putting the coffee pot back on the coffee maker to catch the remaining coffee. I actually had to instruct him to put it back.

    So yeah, the dumbest person I’ve worked with let coffee spill all over because apparently it’s unacceptable to have water in your coffee.