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while I agree with it, there’s also another side to it
I’ve been on too many calls where the meeting leader / management says some bullshit that’s incredibly unclear and unactionable, and they need to admit that in front of everybody before they start blaming teams for underperforming
Wait, you pay attention during a teams meeting? How? Can you teach me this superpower?
Yup, after 25+ mins of conversation, often there aren’t any actionable takeaways and noone has taken ownership of anything.
I’d much rather spend a few mins working out who’s on the hook for what, rather than meet again in a week and discuss the whole thing again with zero progress in between.
It depends on how much management is above or below.
There have definitely been times in my life where a meeting was just a reason to zone out and take a break while someone else got their chance to listen to their own voice.
But you need to ask doubts though
Real answer: true.
Joke answer: so I was done, but you wanted to ask me a… question ⁉️ 🤪
And then it’s not even a question but a statement phrased as question just to sound smart
Just rehashing what was already said.
Used to work security, and one time during our CPR/AED training, this dude, we’ll call him Officer Dumbfuck, kept asking dumbass questions. We’re talking, like, “if a person is pregnant and too large to get my hands around for a heimlich, can I just punch them?” And “if there’s no AED available, should we just shock them with like some wires plugged into a socket?”
Which, I mean, good thing he asked instead of doing that shit… But yeah. Officer Dumbfuck was a dumb fuck. Our entire training was supposed to be around 2 hours. We were there for 6. The instructor barely would get two or three sentences in before Officer Dumbfuck came in with another dumb as fuck question.
Finally, by the end, the instructor is visible upset, everyone there is stressed as fuck and we all just want to leave.
Instructor: okay. Well. I think we have covered every possible thing. So if we’re done here, I’m going to get home.
Me: excitedly actually I have a question!
Entire class: exhales enough to change the humidity in the room
Instructor: defeated, exhausted … Yes?
Me: nah I’m just screwing with y’all. See ya next year!
Oh my god, this triggers me. Last meeting of the day, already longer than necessary because people just repeat the same bullshit over and over and then, when everybody is ready to go, some asshole cunt brings up a completely unrelated topic. So much rage.
Solution is simple:
- Meeting Lead: “If there are no questions we can end the meeting early.”
- Sergio: “Ok, bye!” (signs off)
- Moot McDetail: “Ackshully, I just was wondering…”
If you have work, why don’t you ask your manager if you can get back to it?
Because then the manager might directly order you to wait. So then if you leave you’re directly disobeying an order.
But if you just sign off and they call you on it, you can say you were SO ENERGIZED to meet this quarter’s deadlines that you just couldn’t stop yourself from getting back to work on the project! Then you can say “yeah, it’s my biggest flaw, I’m so excited about my work that sometimes I don’t spend enough time in meetings.” Bonus: that way you never get promoted to management.
Everyone at my office would think of the same person after seeing this. It’s always the same fuckin guy.
We had someone like this in our team; we called him Colin The Cuntopillar.
End call early?
*ends call*
For that reason, there should be a sysadmin in every call, who can just reboot the offenders machine
Don’t you fucking dare suggest that I as a sysadmin must now attend every single meeting in the company.
I mean I could do that, while playing games on the second monitor, and getting no other work done.
Just don’t complain when everything comes crashing down in a month from lack of maintenance.Or a hired killer on standby.
If you’re the one doing this in a last-minute meeting at 5pm on a Friday, just don’t.
you know what, I’m kind of on their side. don’t fucking book meetings on Fridays, let alone Friday afternoon. make it painful so they learn their lesson. short term pain, long term gain.
