ThePlexus
  • Communities
  • Create Post
  • Create Community
  • heart
    Support Lemmy
  • search
    Search
  • Login
  • Sign Up
RobotToaster@mander.xyz to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 3 days ago

Violent drunk banned from booze after throwing flapjack at police officer's genitals having missed with Pot Noodle

uk.news.yahoo.com

external-link
message-square
22
fedilink
143
external-link

Violent drunk banned from booze after throwing flapjack at police officer's genitals having missed with Pot Noodle

uk.news.yahoo.com

RobotToaster@mander.xyz to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 3 days ago
message-square
22
fedilink
Kristen Naylor had been taken to a police station after attacking his father
alert-triangle
You must log in or register to comment.
  • MurrayL@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    65
    ·
    3 days ago

    For any confused Americans, a British flapjack is not a pancake, it’s more of a soft granola bar.

    • disorderly@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      51
      ·
      3 days ago

      Oh thanks, that really clears things up.

      • IrateAnteater@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        20
        ·
        3 days ago

        Yeah. You can add Canada to the confused list. Is “pot noodle” ramen or something?

        • heliotrope@retrofed.com
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          24
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          edit-2
          3 days ago

          Calling it ramen is like saying McDonald’s is a restaurant; but yeah, pretty much.

          Picture:

          A chicken and mushroom flavour Pot Noodle

          • TwodogsFighting@lemdro.id
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            5
            ·
            2 days ago

            Excellent anology.

        • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          19
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          3 days ago

          Marijuana infused noodles. 😌

          • heliotrope@retrofed.com
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            12
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            3 days ago

            (Context for people out of the loop: this is a joke)

        • fakeman_pretendname@feddit.uk
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          5
          ·
          2 days ago

          Dried noodles, a few peas and some flavouring in a plastic pot/tub/cup/container, which you add boiling water to to “cook”.

          Generally for eating at work/school etc, where you might want warm food but only have a kettle (electric water boiling device).

        • phutatorius@lemmy.zip
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          2 days ago

          Imagine the shittiest possible form of ramen. That’s the best pot noodles.

          • Digestive_Biscuit@feddit.uk
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            2
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            2 days ago

            Bombay bad boy tho…

  • Etterra@discuss.online
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    2 days ago

    TIL that “pot noodle” is what Brits call instant noodles cups.

  • kescusay@lemmy.worldM
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    15
    ·
    2 days ago

    That can’t possibly be the actual headline.

    [Checks headline]

    Well I’ll be damned…

  • melsaskca@lemmy.ca
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    2 days ago

    When the cops protested he violently battered them with a soft cardboard cone of pink fluffy candy floss. /s

  • Almacca@aussie.zone
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    17
    ·
    3 days ago

    That sentence had more twists than an M. Night Shyamalan movie.

    • neukenindekeuken@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      2 days ago

      So…2?

  • SarcasticMan@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    15
    ·
    3 days ago

    Sometimes you got to give them the ol’Pot Noodle Flapjack attack!

  • Tomtits@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    2 days ago

    Was expecting the Daily Sport with a headline like that

  • TowardsTheFuture@lemmy.zip
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    9
    ·
    2 days ago

    God a cup noodle AND a cliff bar? SUCH VIOLENCE!

  • aarch0x40@piefed.social
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    8
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    3 days ago

    He should have used a sandwich

    • phutatorius@lemmy.zip
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      2 days ago

      I thought milk shakes were preferred?

  • Formfiller@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    2 days ago

    Hero

  • TIEPilot@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    5
    arrow-down
    5
    ·
    2 days ago

    How about he can have all the booze he wants, but banned from violence?

Not The Onion@lemmy.world

nottheonion@lemmy.world

Subscribe from Remote Instance

Create a post
You are not logged in. However you can subscribe from another Fediverse account, for example Lemmy or Mastodon. To do this, paste the following into the search field of your instance: [email protected]

Welcome

We’re not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from…
  2. …credible sources, with…
  3. …their original headlines, that…
  4. …would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, ableist, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

Visibility: Public
globe

This community can be federated to other instances and be posted/commented in by their users.

  • 1.63K users / day
  • 4.18K users / week
  • 7.05K users / month
  • 14.7K users / 6 months
  • 1 local subscriber
  • 21.9K subscribers
  • 957 Posts
  • 24.9K Comments
  • Modlog
  • mods:
  • kescusay@lemmy.world
  • BE: 0.19.8
  • Modlog
  • Instances
  • Docs
  • Code
  • join-lemmy.org